給你一個不要向設計師求助的理由

由 **壞壞惹人愛** 周六 7月 17, 2010 1:19 am

Story goes :

Shannon (the secretary) has lost her cat and has asked David (the graphic designer) to help with a lost poster. This is their email correspondence...
Read from top to bottom….

故事因由:
S祕書小姐的小貓(MISSY)不見了，故向D先生(平面設計人員)求助，請他幫助設計一張海報，以下為電郵的內容。

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.15am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Poster

Hi
I opened the screen door yesterday and my cat got out and has been missing since then so I was wondering if you are not to busy you could make a poster for me.
It has to be A4 and I will photocopy it and put it around my suburb this afternoon.
哈囉，昨天我把紗門開著，小貓就跑掉了，我在想要是你不太忙的話，是不是可以幫忙弄張海報。海報要是A4大小的，我會拿去影印然後在這個下午到處貼。

This is the only photo of her I have she answers to the name Missy and is black and white and about 8 months old. missing on Harper street and my phone number.
她叫MISSY，黑白混色，約8個月大。
Thanks Shan.

From:David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.26am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
That is shocking news.
Although I have two clients expecting completed work this afternoon, I will, of course, drop everything and do whatever it takes to facilitate the speedy return of Missy.
Regards, David.
親愛的S小姐，這是多麼讓人驚訝的消息，雖然我下午前還得把兩個客戶的東西給趕完，
不過我當然會先放下手上的所有工作來優先處理你的小貓。

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 9.37am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Poster

yeah ok thanks. I know you dont like cats but I am really worried about mine. I have to leave at 1pm today.
謝囉。我知道你不喜歡貓，但我真的很擔心牠。對了，今天下午一點我就要離開囉。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.17am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
I never said I don't like cats. Attached poster as requested.
我從沒說過我討厭貓。附件為你要的海報。
Regards, David.

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.24am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah thats not what I was looking for at all. it looks like a movie and how come the photo of Missy is so small?
這跟我想的不太一樣，它看上去甚麼有點像電影海報?
然後為什麼我小貓咪的照片會小成這樣....

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.28am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
It's a design thing. The cat is lost in the negative space.
Regards, David.
對不起，這是設計。這想表達小貓消失於空間中的意像。

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.33am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Thats just stupid. Can you do it properly please? I am extremely emotional over this and was up all night in tears. you seem to think it is funny.
Can you make the photo bigger please and fix the text and do it in colour please. Thanks.
這海報真的很蠢，可以正經一點好嗎? 你也許認為這很有趣，但我己經為此哭了一整晚了，
現在心情非常的不好。你可不可以把照片變大一點然後將文字上色，拜託了。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.46am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

Dear Shannon,
Having worked with designers for a few years now, I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism.
I don't come downstairs and tell you how to send text messages, log onto Facebook and look out of the window. I have amended and attached the poster as per your instructions.
Regards, David.
在跟設計人員工作了那麼久之後，我還以為你己經明白一個道理。無論你多痛狠我們的設計，
我們都不太歡迎惡意批評。正常來說呢，我們設計人員的職務是不包含教你如何打EMAIL，
登入FACEBOOK以及一些有的沒的小事情。海報己按你的要求修改完成。

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 10.59am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

This is worse than the other one. can you make it so it shows the whole photo of Missy and delete the stupid text that says missing missy off it? I just want it to say Lost.
這比之前那張更糟，你可不可以把拿掉那些白目的句子，然後把我小貓的整張照片都顯示出來呢。
我只不過想說我小貓不見了。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.14am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

(* PS: 這是從2006年演到2010年，播了六季的知名美劇『LOST』的海報。)

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.21am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Poster

yeah can you do the poster or not? I just want a photo and the word lost and the telephone number and when and where she was lost and her name. Not like a movie poster or anything stupid.
I have to leave early today. If it was your cat I would help you. Thanks.
喂… 你到底要不要幫忙啦! 我不過是想把“走失”兩個字，電話號碼，以及小貓走失的時間和地點都打在海報上，
如此而己，不要再把海報搞得像張電影海報一樣的好嗎，不要再耍白目了!
我待就會得出門了，如果今天是妳的貓不見了我嘛會幫你。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.32am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Awww

Dear Shannon,
I don't have a cat. I once agreed to look after a friend's cat for a week but after he dropped it off at my apartment and explained the concept of kitty litter.
I have attached the amended version of your poster as per your detailed instructions.
Regards, David.
我沒有養小貓，但是我曾經有個朋友寄養一隻小貓在我家一個星期，但一星期後，他沒來領回去，取而代之的是教導我如何照顧小貓.....你懂的。好啦，附件為你要求的海報，都有附合你的要求喔。^_^

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.47am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Awww

Thats not my cat. where did you get that picture from? That cat is orange. I gave you a photo of my cat.
那。不。是。我。的。貓!! 哪來的照片，不知道你有沒有注意到，那隻貓是橘色的耶，我貓的照片不是己經給過你了嗎。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 11.58am
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Awww

I know, but that one is cute. As Missy has quite possibly met any one of several violent ends, it is possible you might get a better cat out of this.
If anybody calls and says "I haven't seen your orange cat but I did find a black and white one with its hind legs run over by a car, do you want it?"
you can politely decline and save yourself a costly veterinarian bill.
Regards, David.
我懂，但這貓很可愛咩。你要知道，你的貓可能己經糟遇不測，如果可以因而找到一隻更可愛的不是更好嗎。而且阿，搞不好會有誰會打給你然後說：YO~ 我沒看到你那橘貓，但我有找到一隻黑、白混色的小貓，牠後腿被車子輾過了，你要嗎?"
這時候你還可以禮貌的拒絕他，並省下不少的醫療費。

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.07pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: AwwwPlease just use the photo I gave you.
就用我給你的照片，拜託。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.22pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.34pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

I didnt say there was a reward. I dont have $2000 dollars. What did you even put that there for? Apart from that it is perfect can you please remove the reward bit. Thanks Shan.
我沒說過有酬金!! 我沒那麼多錢啦! 沒事幹麼放那個上去呢?
麻煩你把酬金拿掉。除此之外，就沒問題了。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.42pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.51pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Can you just please take the reward bit off altogether? I have to leave in ten minutes and I still have to make photocopies of it.
.....你可不可以單純的把酬金那句文字給拿掉就好?
我十分鐘內就得走了，我還要拿去影印。

From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 12.56pm
To: Shannon Walkley
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

From: Shannon Walkley
Date: Monday 21 June 2010 1.03pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Awww

Fine. That will have to do.
好吧....就這樣吧。